Ruminations: Petals Falling on Complicated Ground

“I was like Momma, sweet and cool and able to handle men--at least, I was learning.”

Sexuality. What do you think when you hear or read the word? What do you think determines it? Our experiences? An intrinsic spiritual and physical element? I thought about all this while delving into Petals on the Wind, the sequel to Flowers in the Attic. As eldest siblings Cathy and Christopher grow into young adulthood, they also grow into adult sexuality. Cathy’s journey in particular is an interesting case as she not only continues as narrator but is discovering her sexual self. What kind of sexual being will she be?

Still reeling from family tragedy, secrets, and her intense love for her brother, Cathy tries to navigate what it means to be a woman and a sexual being. Her journey  reminds me of Jane Villanueva in the CW hit Jane the Virgin. If you’ve ever watched the show, you know that Jane is saving sex for marriage while still maintain sex positivity. Her journey to that decision started with a lecture her Abuela gave her as Jane approached her teenage years. Abuela’s admonition to maintain “purity” until marriage was marked by a metaphorical tampering with a woman’s sexuality before marriage: the crumpling of a white flower. Jane’s virginity is not just a physical state or decision;  it’s a performance of her commitment to sexual purity. Even through all that, Jane still finds a way to cope with and manage her physical desires, sometimes going off the rails. (Spoiler alert: she does eventually get married!) Of course we know the human experience (sexual or not) is far more complicated than a lecture about a bruised flower…. Or do we? This raises questions of how complex human sexuality is and also the nature of performance particularly in female sexuality. In Petals, Cathy goes from lovesick puppy, to temptress, to uninterested prey with the three men in her life, all the while juggling what kind of sexual woman she wants to be. With that in mind, it seems the author frames Cathy’s sexuality as something transitory and constantly evolving in relationship to her male counterparts. Her sexuality is responsive, a reaction to the prospective suitor’s personality. So is her sexual nature a product of her genetic and physiological make up or is it in response to those she desires? Is this true for all of us? I’m definitely not a sex educator, but taking a look at our own journeys to our sexualities is an exercise worth doing.

Come back for the review of Petals in the Wind on July 28. Let me know what  you think!